The Mentalist

Sundays 10:00 PM on CBS
The mentalist
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Minelli: You abused a corpse to get a confession.
Jane: Used. Used a corpse. There's no "ab."

Minelli: (talking about Lisbon) You're worried about her. You think she might do something stupid?
Jane: Suicide? No. If she did, she wouldn't blame the bureau.
Minelli: That's not my concern at all!

Jane: I'm touched that you would risk your career over me. That means a lot to me.
Lisbon: If you're right, and I'm not saying you are, it would mean I broke the trust of somebody I respect and admire for your sake. If it is true, I would hope in the future you'd be a little bit more mature and responsible in your behavior.
Jane: I'm grateful and all that, but let's not go crazy here.
Lisbon: I should have let you rot in jail.

Lisbon: Look, I hope we can get you out of this mess. But it's also true that I do hope that you learn a lesson from this. There are real boundaries in life. These are real prison walls.
Jane: (almost whispering) Only in your mind, Lisbon. Only in your mind.

Escort Deputy: The arresting officer advises protective custody.
Deputy Bulger: Are you a cop or a child rapist?
Jane: Neither.
Deputy Bulger: What do you need protective custody for, then?
Jane: Well, I guess I don't.
Deputy Bulger: Your funeral.

Lisbon: How did it go with Bosco?
Jane: Good. It was, uh, it was very good. We had a frank exchange of views.
Lisbon: So he's gonna keep us in the loop?
Jane: No.
Lisbon: No?
Jane: Wouldn't direct me to the bathroom if my ass was on fire.

Jane: Can I please continue working with you?
Lisbon: I thought you were quitting.
Jane: You know I didn't mean that.
Lisbon: So the job is worth wile, is it?
Jane: Uh, it's not that. I mean, it' not that at all. It's just... I have nothing else to do.
Lisbon: No jokes. From now, there have to be boundaries.
Jane: Agreed.
Lisbon: I need to know that you can do your work and be effective without creating a mess that I have to clean up.
Jane: No mess, I swear.
Lisbon: On that basis, you can remain with the unit.
Jane: Thank you.

Cho: Nice. I could arrest you for that.
Jane: You'll never take me alive, copper.
Cho: Seriously.
Jane: Seriously, it's Marilyn and Charlie. What, do you want to make a comedy arrest, see your name written in the weird news section?

Cho: How is he?
Lisbon: Guess what, he's a bad patient.
Cho: Who would've thought.
Jane: I'm not a bad patient. She's a bad visitor.

Jane: Oh, please don't look at each other like that.
Lisbon: Like what? You can't see.
Jane: I can feel. I can feel your pity.

Jane: Grace, personal question. Rigsby and I were wondering, uh...who is this man you were kissing by the coffee cart?
Van Pelt: That's...that's none of your business.
Jane: Not from payroll?
Van Pelt: Payroll? No, he doesn't even work here. It's none of your business.
Jane: Well, thank heavens for that, at least. No killing needed.
Rigsby: Don't be so sure.
Jane: You'll see. Honesty's best.
Rigsby: Yeah, honestly, I'd like to kick your butt right now.

Rigsby: Jane, I need to ask you a favor. I need you to, uh...I need you to find out from Van Pelt about this guy she's dating. You know, what's the score?
Jane: The score?
Rigsby: Is it serious? Are they, uh, you know?
Jane: Ask her yourself.
Rigsby: Yeah, right. No. Come on. You know the situation. It's against the rules, relationships between coworkers.
Jane: What are you, a man or a mouse?
Rigsby: A man, obviously.
Jane: Could've fooled me.
Rigsby: If it's that guy from payroll, I will kill him.
Jane: Well, that would be a strong, romantic statement. Women like a man that would kill for them. Hey, Van Pelt!
Rigsby: Don't!

Displaying quotes 409 - 420 of 451 in total

The Mentalist Quotes

As they say, you can take the girl out of Chicago but you can't take the Chicago out of the girl.

Jane

Teresa Lisbon: Why don't you go back to my place, jump into bed? I'll come and tuck you in when I'm done.
Patrick Jane: I'd rather be here with you.