Penny: You are so butch.
Leonard: Oh, I got a little paper cut.
Penny: Of course you did, your hands are softer than veal.

Raj: You got this buddy.
Leonard: Yeah, come on, Howard. Hook that worm.
Raj: You can do it.
Penny: That's great. Cheerleading. Way to man things up.

Don't name him. Just jam a hook into his face.

Bernadette: Gosh, Amy. I'm sensing a little hostility. Is it maybe because like Sheldon's work, your sex life is also theoretical?
Penny: Damn.
Amy: Well, at least, when we do make love, Sheldon won't be thinking about his mother.

Amy: At some point, they're bound to lock horns.
Penny: I'm assuming these are some kind of horns they bought at Comic-Con?

Leonard, why do you always do this? Listen to me, you are the one that I'm with. You know that I love you. So, will you please relax, because you are driving me crazy.

Leonard: Who you talking to?
Penny: Just this guy I met at school.
Leonard: We're still dating, right?

Sheldon: Get the Mad Hatter on the horn, I'm having a tea party.
Penny: You might want to pace yourself.
Sheldon: I drink tea all the time. I think I know what I'm doing.
Penny: Far be it from me to criticize a man with a full pubis.

Hey, this is my paper. And, my perspective is that slavery is bad. Oh, and my professor's black, so I'm pretty sure that's the right answer.

Amy: You have to be the weirdest couple I know.
Penny: Really? You can't think of anyone weirder?
Amy: I can, [whispers] but she's sitting right there.

Sometimes I forget how smart you are.

Penny: You're unbelievable.
Sheldon: I know.

TBBT Quotes

Penny: Hey, Sheldon, did you change your Wi-Fi password again?
Sheldon: Yes, it's "Penny, get your own Wi-Fi." No spaces.

It's very simple. Scissors cuts paper, paper covers rock, rock crushes lizard, lizard poisons Spock, Spock smashes scissors, scissors decapitates lizard, lizard eats paper, paper disproves Spock, Spock vaporizes rock, and, as it always has, rock crushes scissors

Sheldon