The Big Bang Theory

Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBS
The big bang theory
TV Fanatic Works Better with Prime Instant Video
40,000 other titles are available to watch now.

Penny: Hi. Did Sheldon change the Wi-Fi password again?
Leonard: Yeah, it's "Penny already eats our food she can pay for Wi-Fi." No spaces.

Bernadette: Doesn't he know you have a boyfriend?
Penny: Oh, she doesn't have a boyfriend; she has a Sheldon.

Amy, little vixen. Just working it under all those layers of wool and polyester.

Leonard: No. You always picked and it was always the same. An hour and a half of beach houses in the rain until the woman turns around and realizes love was here all along.
Penny: But, come on, that was a great movie and it starts in ten minutes.

Penny: And,remember he's more afraid of you than you are of him.
Sheldon: That doesn't help.
Penny: No, I was talking to the bird.

Leonard: Star Wars on Blu-ray.
Penny: Haven't you seen that movie like a thousand times?
Leonard: Not on Blu-ray. Only twice on Blu-ray.
Penny: Oh, Leonard.
Leonard: I know, it's high resolution sadness.

It's a rough month when Halloween and PMS hit at the same time.

Oh, they don't always get to ride the roller coaster. Sometimes they only get to spin the teacups.

Penny: Wil Wheaton is Sheldon's mortal enemy.
Amy: Mortal enemy?
Penny: Mm-hmm.
Amy: Sheldon, I know you are a bit of a left-handed monkey wrench but... you really have a mortal enemy?
Sheldon: In fact, I have 61 of them.

Sheldon: The Koothrappalis aren't just rich, they're Richie Rich rich.
Penny: How much is that?
Sheldon: About halfway between Bruce Wayne and Scrooge McDuck.

Okay, so future grief-stricken widow is the one to beat.

I feel like two totally different people. Dr. Jekyyl and Mrs. Whore.

Displaying quotes 193 - 204 of 362 in total

TBBT Quotes

Penny: Here's a question-- as an alien pretending to be human, are you planning to engage in any post-prom mating rituals with Amy?
Sheldon: There are post-prom mating rituals?
Penny: Not always. Unless your date drives a van with an air mattress, then always.
Sheldon: Well, if it's part of the prom experience, then I'm open to it.
Penny: You're kidding.
Sheldon: I may be an alien, but I have urges.If Amy wants to copulate by firing her eggs into space, well, then, I will happily catch them with the reproductive sac on my upper flermin. I'm not the best at reading facial cues, but I can see that you're a little turned on.

Penny, there's only one cookie with something in the middle that solves life's problems, and that's an Oreo. Or a Nutter Butter, if you're in a pinch.

Sheldon