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Penny [to Sheldon]: Your food's ready.
Leonard: No, no, what are you doing? He's both happy and quiet. It's like seeing a unicorn and Bigfoot at the same time.

I'm not going to the mall with someone dressed like a dumb space bear.

That's right. My phone is just as smart as you guys.

Bernadette told me everything. Now you don't get the left or the right.

Leonard: They weren't boobies. They were muscles. And, the make-up was green, I was pretending to be the Hulk.
Penny: You were wearing her bra.
Leonard: That was to keep my muscles from sagging!

Penny: Not even the chapter on the breast feeding crisis?
Leonard: It was not a crisis. Apparently, I favored the left one, she got a little lopsided.
Penny: Oh, my God, you still go left!

Penny: Oh, come on. Why? How bad could it be?
Leonard: There-there's chapters about potty training, bed wetting and masturbation. Basically, if something came out of me, she wrote about it!

The Disappointing Child by Beverly Hofstadter.

Raj: I didn't want anyone to feel bad at the end of the game. Some of those puzzles were really hard. I didn't know who was going to get Penny.
Penny: Run.
Raj: That came out wrong. But you have to admit you had a wonderful time.
Penny: Run to India.

Sheldon: To the planetarium!
Penny: Let's go!
Leonard: To the Tar Pits!
Bernadette: Let's go!
Amy: There's a Neil Diamond concert next month.
Howard: Let's go!

Penny: Oh it's a blowing alley.
Sheldon: Yes. My brain is better than everybody [holds up bowling ball].

Think of Sheldon when you apply it.

Penny (hands Howard the coupon)
Displaying quotes 61 - 72 of 337 in total

TBBT Quotes

Howard: Attention people of Earth: Tonight, there will be two moons in the sky.

Sheldon: Why do you have the Chinese character for "soup" tattooed on your right buttock?
Penny: It's not "soup," it's "courage."
Sheldon: No it isn't. But I suppose it does take courage to demonstrate that kind of commitment to soup.
Penny: How'd you see it? You said you wouldn't look.
Sheldon: Sorry. As I told you, the hero always peeks.

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