Peter Griffin Quotes
Peter: Shut up, Meg!
Brian: You're back!
Meg: [dejectedly] Yay.
We should not rule out the Predator having been the farter.
[to his feral self] Don't listen to that Peter! That Peter is a liar! Run, be free! They will enslave you! [makes random grunting noises]
Peter: You know, we saved so much trouble not flying commercial I think we came out ahead.
Joe: Sure. Drive right up to the plane.
Peter: Exactly. If we went to Logan, that plane wouldn't crash for another hour at least. [plane crashes behind him] Oh, they made pretty good time!
Peter: A private plane? How'd you swing that, Quagmire?
Quagmire: Let's just say I walked in John Travolta with not-Kelly-Preston.
I always wanted to go to Canada, but then South Park went so we couldn't go.
I've just been hanging out here, having a great time with...Meg?!
Peter: Hey Horace, how about you take that weiner out of your hand and give me a beer?
Horace: Don't talk to me that way, you son of a bitch!
I'm feeling ship-shape, if the ship is the SS Minnow! Doctor said I'd be making bland jokes for a week.
Peter: Excuse me, which one was Lindsay Lohan's dessert fork?
Waiter: I think it was that one.
Peter: [licks fork] Give me cocaine!
What the hell, Lois? Yesterday you were all over me, and then for a confusing period, inside of me!
Lois: Peter, what happened to your voice?
Peter: Oh, you know what happened, you sexy minx. My white blood cells attacked the pathogens and created antibodies and then the pathogens were filtered out by my kidneys into my urine and then expelled from my body, you slut.