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Family-guy

Hey, I'm not just a poorly-cleaned butt. There's a whole man around man around that you have to please.

Stewie: You should know that Mom has emotionally let you go. It won't be long before she takes another.
Peter: Owww, my head!
Stewie: She already has two cell phones.

Hey, was Beowulf a Teen Wolf sequel with Scott Baio?

Peter: Lois, do you have any idea what i'm looking at right now?
Lois: Peter, we're not doing this again.
Peter: I am at Harvard, the smartest school in the country. And they have...
Lois: Peter, breakfast for dinner is anarchy!
Peter: It's fun, Lois! It's whimsical!
Lois: It's ridiculous! Pancakes are not a nighttime food!
Peter: You're ridiculous!

Hey, can you read that page with all the little paragraphs about dead people? They're hilarious.

Hey Brian, can you believe I found this blazer on the side of the highway?

Okay, try this. Hit up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, Start; then we'll have unlimited lives.

Peter: If radio DJs have taught me anything about radio, it's that you gotta do two things: turn it up and rip the knob off!

Brian: I think, I think we're launching!
Lois: Oh my god, everyone strap yourselves in! Stewie, hold my hand.
Stewie: No thanks, I prefer to die giving you the finger.
Peter: If this is what it takes to get out of Florida, fine.

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