Family Guy

Peter Griffin Quotes (Page 74)

Peter: That was then and this is now. And this is a chair. And that's a lamp. And you have boobies. And I'm gonna find that trophy!
 • Rating: 4.4 / 5.0

Peter [about a handbag]: Oh I love you sweety. What are they like 10 bucks?
Meg: More like eleven...hundred.
Peter: Heh, you wished I loved you that much
 • Rating: Unrated

Joe: Peter wanted the trophy the most.
Peter: I couldn't have stolen the trophy. Last night I was stealing Joe's ladder so I could steal the trophy tonight.
Lois: Peter!
Peter: What? It's a ladder, he's not gonna use it. That's like taking a watch off a dead guy
 • Rating: Unrated

Peter: You told them that we cheat on our taxes, steal lawn mowers, and worship some guy named Stan.
Bonnie: Actually I said Satan. That must have been a typo
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Peter: And Cleveland, you're the boss because of your attention to detail. Like when we play pool, you take so long to line up your shot that I just want to crack you with a cue stick. But I don't because that would be a hate crime and I love you
 • Rating: Unrated

Brian: It's amazing, Peter. You've inspired the whole neighborhood to work together.
Peter: You know what's really amazing? I haven't brushed my teeth in three days, and no-one has said a thing
 • Rating: Unrated

Lois: This could be a great chance for you two to bond.
Peter: Bond? James Bond. I'll do it
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Lois: It's Stewie. He peed on the carpet.
Peter: Do I... Do I hit him?
Lois: No!
 • Rating: Unrated

Peter: Hey Brian. How ya doin'? They let you out already?
Brian: Peter, I was in a therapy session, not a lunatic asylum
 • Rating: Unrated

Brian: My therapist thinks he's figured out what my problem is.
Peter: Oh yeah, what does Sigmund Fraud think it is?
Brian: He, ah, thinks I'm in love.
Peter: Oh my God. You can talk!
Brian: Never mind
 • Rating: Unrated

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