Pierce: My name is Pierce Hawthorne, and yes, that's Hawthorne as in "Hawthorne Wipes," the award-winning most towelette.
Jeff: I was just gonna ask.

Sexually harassing? That makes no sense to me. Why would I harass someone that turns me on?

Pierce: Abed the Arab? Is that inappropriate?
Abed: Sure.

Abed: This is kinda like Breakfast Club, right?
Pierce: Is there breakfast?

Community Quotes

Me and Abed have an agreement. If one of us dies, we stage it to look like a suicide caused by the unjust cancellation of Firefly. We're gonna get that show back on the air buddy!

Troy

Annie: When you found out I was Jewish, you invited me to a 'pool party' that turned out to be a Baptism.
Shirley: Well excuse me for trying to sneak you into Heaven.