The Simpsons

Principal Skinner Quotes (Page 3)

Superintendent Chalmers: We're gonna put Bart Simpson away for a long, long time.
Principal Skinner: By law, the most we can give him is a 10-day suspension.
Superintendent Chalmers: That's long to a kid.
 • Rating: Unrated

Nelson: (to Washington Post reporter) Haw-haw! Your medium is dying!
Principal Skinner: Nelson!
Nelson: But it is.
Principal Skinner: There's being right and there's being nice.
 • Rating: Unrated

(In "Mr. & Mrs. Simpson" Homer and Marge both shoot Principal Skinner.)
Principal Skinner: (Dying) Remember me... on pizza... Fridays.
Homer: No!
 • Rating: Unrated

Skinner: Okay, you have a deal, you conniving little (whispers in Bart's ear)
Bart: Wow, that's a swear!?
Skinner: Used as a noun, it is.
 • Rating: Unrated

Principal Skinner: Simpson! I'll teach you to make a Poupon me!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Lisa: I've got something! The sixth grade security camera shows three empty desks.
Principal Skinner: Enhance!
(Camera zooms in on desk with "Skinner Stinks" carved into it)
Principal Skinner: De-hance! De-hance!
 • Rating: Unrated

Principal Skinner: (On the phone) Lord, give me guidance... That's right, the guidance department. Thank you, Mrs. Lord.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Milhouse: Lisa, if I don't make it back, there's a letter in my locker I want you to read.
Lisa: I've already read it.
Principal Skinner: We've all read it.
 • Rating: Unrated

Skinner: Moving on, our class trip to Italy is now spaghetti night at Papa John's. And your $1,500 deposits will not be refunded.
Homer: (excitedly) Ooh! Papa John's.
 • Rating: Unrated

Mrs. Krabapel: This game is a great way to meet eligible men who can afford a computer.
(Skinner's character, a scaly turkey, comes up)
Skinner: Or have access to one in the school library.
Mrs. Krabapel: It's amazing how you can be a turkey in every reality.
Skinner: What's important is we're talking.
 • Rating: Unrated

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