Leonard: Hi. I'm Leonard. You are beautiful. You pop, sparkle and buzz electric. I'm going to pick you up at eight, show you a night you will never forget.
Raj: Where are we going?

Tell her her eyes shimmer like opalescent lilies in the lake of the palace of the celestial maidens.

I find a girl I like, and you're stealing her?!

Oh, it's okay. I have no morals and I'm desperately lonely. I'll be the other man if you want a little something-something on the side.

Oh, Hallow-weenies!

Amy: An evening looking at the stars, that's still kind of romantic.
Raj: Except I'll be alone.
Amy: I'm trying to put lipstick on a pig here. Work with me.

I do have a pretty balls-to-the-wall moisturizing regime.

You can't sink, with all that helium in you you'll float away.

Raj [to Sheldon]

Oh my God. She's not going to bathe me, is she?

Raj: It's also a live mine, so there'll be dynamite explosions going off in the distance.
Sheldon: Yeah, I have a lactose-intolerant roommate with a taste
for ice cream. Next.
Raj: Oh, you have to be down there for 12 hours at a time.
Sheldon: Yeah? We have to be somewhere.
Raj: Well, there's no toilets-- we'll have to do our business
in a bucket.
Sheldon: So it's settled-- we're not doing it.

Nothing rhymes with orange. It's probably lonely.

I'm counting that as foreplay.

TBBT Quotes

Penny: Hey, Sheldon, did you change your Wi-Fi password again?
Sheldon: Yes, it's "Penny, get your own Wi-Fi." No spaces.

Penny: What actor holds the record for being named People magazine's Sexiest Man Alive?
Sheldon: William Shatner!
Leonard: I don't think it's Shatner.
Sheldon: Then it's got to be Patrick Stewart