The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSRajesh "Raj" Koothrappali Quotes
Wow. It's like the Ganges on laundry day.
Leonard: The meteors are so pretty.
Raj: With your American accent, everything you say sounds stupid.
If I could speak the language of rabbits, they would be amazed and I would be their king... I would be kind to my rabbit subjects... at first.... One day, I hold a great ball for the President of France, but the rabbits don't come. I'm embarrassed so I eat all the lettuce in the world.. and make the rabbits watch.
Wolowitz: There are two not-unattractive middle school teachers.
Raj: Wonderful. How old are they?
Wolowitz: Fifty, fifty-five.
Raj: Woh, menopause, nature's birth control.
"Sorry" doesn't make up for the fact that I had to make chicken and rice with this vegan guy! Do you know what vegan chicken and rice is? Rice!
Raj: The only thing I've learned in the last two hours is that American men love drinking beer, pee too often, and have trouble getting erections.
Leonard: Focus on the game, not the commercials, Raj.
Raj: I'm just saying, maybe if you people cut back on the beer, you could get out of the bathroom and satisfy your women without pharmaceutical help.
Raj: You always do this, you know. You ditch me for a woman you have no shot with
Wolowitz: I totally had a shot
Raj: With a woman you were chasing through a park? That's not a shot, that's a felony
Wolowitz: I would have caught up to her if I didn't pull my hammy
Raj: Oh please, you weigh 80 pounds, you don't have a hammy
Leonard just realized that Penny's been hiding him from her friends because he's a tiny little man who flies kites
Sorry boys, say "hi" to your mother when she comes to pick you up... or I could just tell her later tonight!
Raj: Did you know, in the Mumbai-McDonald's you can't get a Big Mac? All you can get is a Chicken Maharajah Mac. And the special sauce: Curry. Which, in India, believe you me, is really not that special
Raj: No, no, no, no, that rate is much too low for what you'd expect from this collision. Do you understand we're taking about dark matter colliding in outer space?
Sheldon: Yes, of course I understand, and who are you to tell me about outer space?
Raj: Well, I am the astrophysicist! Astro means space!
Sheldon: Astro means star.
Raj: Okay, let me just tell you, if we were having this argument in my native language, I'd be kicking your butt!
Sheldon: English is your native language!
