Lisa: I hope you're happy. You all just wasted your time working your way into an after school class.
Bart, Milhouse, Nelson, and Ralph: Aahhh!

I wanna go back inside mommy.

Grandma had hair like that when she went to sleep in her forever box.

Homer: (To Milhouse) Cops. Act natural.
Homer (Imitating a woman) Oh hello officer!
Chief Wiggum: (While driving by) Oh hello, Ma'am! (To self) What is it about a women and a dumpster.

Chief Wiggum: As you can see, I've gotten everything I ever wanted.
Lou: Except pants that fit.

Bart: (Crashes through window) Party's over, Serpent.
Wiggum: No kidding, you're standing in the dip.

Lou: No sign of the Serpent.
Wiggum: It's always work with you.

(Squishing an ice cream to his forehead) I'm a unitard!

(In "Married to the Blob," Dr. Phil confronts Homer during one of his eating rampages.)
Dr. Phil: You've got a weight problem, and you know it!
Homer: You're right. Starting tomorrow, no bread before dinner.
Dr. Phil: Homer, don't sell me an outhouse and tell me it's a Taj Mahal!
Chief Wiggum: Yeah, Homer, stop doing that!

Female Golem: There's a latke bar downstairs.
Chief Wiggum: Latke? What the hell's a latke?
Female Golem: They're pan-fried--
Chief Wiggum: Case dismissed!!

Can I borrow that ostrich?

Chief Wiggum

The rat symbolizes obviousness!

</i> Ralph Wiggum

The Simpsons Quotes

Officer Eddie: (reading Steve Sax's license) Well well, Steve Sax, from New York City.
Officer Lou: I heard some guy got killed in New York City and they never solved the case. But you wouldn't know anything about that now, would you, Steve?
(Lou and Eddie laugh)
Steve Sax: But there are hundreds of unsolved murders in New York City.
Officer Lou: You don't know when to keep your mouth shut, do you, Saxxy Boy?

Wow, now I see why they call you Miss Hoover. You must have been vacuuming for an hour.

Bart