Richard: He's my dermatologist.
Larry: Really?
Richard: For 15 years now.
Larry: Even with the whole affirmative-action thing?

Richard: How can you not help a blind man?
Larry: How can you say "blind man" in front of a blind man?

Larry: They're not breasts; they're just big, chemical balls.
Richard: You can tell they're fake?
Larry: I can take a guess

Curb Your Enthusiasm Quotes

Larry: Who do you think has more freedom: the married man in America or the single man in Communist China?

Cheryl: Well, I think you should write a letter of apology to him.
Larry: "Dear prick, why are you such a prick?"