Sam Oliver Quotes
Sock: Sam! Listen. Here's what we're going to do. We need to get our stories straight, okay. People are going to come here, they're going to ask questions. We have to have answers ready.
Sam: But our friend is dead!
Sock: Ben would want us to have a cover-up story for the cops and that is a fact, Sam.
Andi: Ooh. We could go on vacation.
Sam: Yes, like a real vacation. Paris.
Andi: We could go to Malta.
Sam: I don't even know where that is!
Sam: I almost got my throat ripped out last night!
Gladys: Drama queen.
Sam: You sent a demon to my house to kill me. Why would you do that?
Gladys: We're in a book club together.
Sam: What, so you agreed to have me assassinated?
Gladys: These book clubs are a lot of pressure
Sock: This is so unfair. I am not her brother. I mean, I don't even look like her. Why does she insist on labeling me as her brother. I just want her to see me the way the rest of the world does.
Sam: And how is that?
Sock: As a sexual magician
Sam: Maybe you guys should cover the other exit.
Sock: Cover the exit with what? Our spines?
Sam: Did it work?
Devil: No, i just wanted to tell you your pentagram is a Star of David. Mazel Tov!
Andi: If there was a life or death situation, would you call Sock?
Sam: Probably not
Andi: If you wanted someone to make you toast, would you call Sock?
Sam: No
Ben: You're a marked man.
Sam: So, I get it. I understand if you guys can't hang out anymore.
Sock: I am sorry, Sam. But we are not here to listen to you whine about which dark army has marked you for death. Ok? We are here right now to honor the passing of the man who may or may not have been your biological father.
Ben: Well said, Sock.
Sock: Thank you. I recommend lighting the right foot and then running like hell
Sam: Evidently, I'm destined to end the world. I can't let that happen.
Sock: Well, you know what? You're not really good at anything, so you'd probably screw that up, too
Devil: Oh look, Sammy, I have too much respect to lie to you, so I tell you in advance that I am most probably going to lie to you. I'm the Devil, Sam, lying is kind of like my whole bag.
Sam: Yeah, well I figured as much.
Devil: Smart boy
Andi: It's because she's hot. This is your process? I spent hours on the phone and you guys just let your crotches be your guide.
Sam: And yet, the job always gets done
Sam: She read Tarot cards?
Devil: Yeah, she was the real deal. Sold her soul to me for the power to predict the future. Earned quite a reputation for herself until the local villagers hung her from a tree for consorting with the Devil. Surprisingly perceptive for a bunch of clods with pitchforks
