Schmidt Quotes (Page 5)
Season 2, Episode 11: "Santa"
Schmidt: He's a player. Why would a good looking person ever become a doctor?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 2, Episode 10: "Bathtub"
Schmidt: Everybody hates the Jews! Your mom's in the majority! I'll convert to Indianism!
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Schmidt: You my boo and I been missing you. I been missing you oh so long.
• Rating: 4.4 / 5.0
Schmidt: I'd put it in a bowl and eat your hair.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Nick: I don't get it. Is this bath water?
Schmidt: Might as well be; it's rosé.
• Rating: 4.7 / 5.0
Season 2, Episode 9: "Eggs"
Schmidt: I can't believe I have to have feelings to have good sex. I thought I'd be dead before that happened.
• Rating: Unrated
Schmidt: Would I have to put my legs in the stirrups?
Melissa: Why would you even ask that?
Schmidt: I'm asking more so out of curiosity than fear. Hashtag, excitement.
• Rating: 4.7 / 5.0
Schmidt: You are a gynecologist and a lesbian. This makes you a vagenius.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Schmidt: I feel like our bodies really made something. Like we brought manufacturing jobs back to America.
• Rating: 3.5 / 5.0
Season 2, Episode 8: "Parents"
Schmidt: Look at that plating. It is impeccable.
Big Schmidt: Nice squeeze bottle work there, Bobby Flay.
Schmidt: He is still relevant!
Big Schmidt: Where? Phoenix?
• Rating: 3.0 / 5.0
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Total Quotes: 91
