Sheldon Cooper Quotes
Penny: So what do you say, Sheldon, are we your X-Men?
Sheldon: No, the X-Men were named for the "X" in "Charles Xavier." Since I am Sheldon Cooper, you will be my "C-Men."
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Leonard: We think we can help you with your stage fright.
Sheldon: Oh, I doubt that. I haven't figured out a way, and I'm much smarter than all of you.
Penny: Yes, buy you're not smaller than all of us put together.
Sheldon: I'm sorry, that is what I meant.
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Penny: I once got a pretty big honor in high school, and I was terrified about appearing in front of a big crowd, but I went through with it, and you know what? The world looked pretty darn good sitting on a haystack in the back of a Ford F-150 as a member of the corn queen's court.
Sheldon: Thank you. I'll bear that in mind if I'm ever nomianted for the hillbilly peace prize.
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Leonard: What, to you, is a large crowd?
Sheldon: Any group big enough to trample me to death. General rule of thumb is 36 adults or 70 children.
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Sheldon: I can't give a speech.
Wolowitz: No, you're mistaken. You give speeches all the time. What you can't do is shut up.
Raj: Before the movie, you did twenty minutes on why guacamole turns brown. It turned brown while you were talking.
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Wolowitz: How's it feel to get beaten up by a girl?
Sheldon: It's not the first time. I have a twin sister whose assaults began in utero. If only I'd had the presence of mind to absorb her. Then I'd have a mole with hair in it, instead of a tedious yearly Christmas letter.
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Penny: Who's Adam West?
Sheldon: Who's Adam West!? Leonard, what do you talk about after the coitus?
Wolowitz: My guess is "four minutes, a new record!"
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How can I possibly discuss with Stan Lee the scientific foundations for inter-stellar flight on a silver surfboard when part of my brain will be scanning his face for signs of contagious skin disease?
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I don't trust banks. I believe that when the robots rise up, ATM's will lead the charge.
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