South Park

Stan Marsh Quotes (Page 8)

Earth Day Person: (waves hands) You don't care about Terrance and Phillip. Nothing matters more than saving the planet from Republicans. You don't need to see Terrance and Phillip.
Stan: No, dude, we really, really do.
Earth Day Person: (to woman) Their will is strong.
 • Rating: Unrated

Cartman: Look, if you don't come and do the show, I'll make you eat your parents.
Phillip: Yeah, whatever, kid.
Stan: He'll do it, dude.
 • Rating: Unrated

Kyle: Hey! Look at that line! It's way shorter.
Stan: I don't think we're female groupies or random sluts.
Cartman: Kenny's a random slut.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Phillip: I'm looking for a mechanic. Can you tell me how to get to the auto garage?
Terrance: Sure, buddy! All you need to do is go down to the - (he farts loudly so nobody could hear what he is saying) - and that's how you get to the auto garage!
Phillip: Can you tell me how to get to the auto garage without farting?
Terrance: Sure. You go the same way except stick your finger up your ass.
Phillip: No, no, no! I mean, could you tell me the directions again without you farting?
Terrance: Ooh! Sure! Just stick your finger up my ass.
Phillip: Alright, no problem, buddy. (sticks finger up his ass) Now, tell me, how do I get to the auto garage to see a mechanic?
Terrance: You're at the auto garage. I am the mechanic.
Phillip: Why the heck didn't you tell me you were the mechanic?
Stan: (watching it on TV) Because I had an itch up my ass.
Terrance: Because I had an itch up my ass.
 • Rating: Unrated

TV Announcer: See Terrance and Phillip live and in person!
Stan: What's this?
 • Rating: Unrated

Stan: The four of us can't help tomorrow night.
Earth Day person: (angrily) YouWhat?
 • Rating: Unrated

Kyle: Dude, Terrance got really fat.
Stan: Yea, he looks terrible.
 • Rating: Unrated

Stan: Some thing very terrible has happened in the world of Terrance and Phillip!
 • Rating: Unrated

Stan: We snuck into that woman's spandex to get in here.
 • Rating: Unrated

(While the boys are at the play in Toronto)
Stan: Jesus tap-dancing Christ, is this thing ever gonna end!?!
 • Rating: 2.0 / 5.0

Are we missing your favorite quote from "?" Submit it here and get points for adding quotes!