Stewie Griffin Quotes
Stewie: No, that's great, actually because, now anyone walking behind you will know you had 60 dollars.
Peter: Whoa, that is awesome, Lois! Your bum looks like an NBA star's arm! Except it's not paying someone to install a Playstation in a car.
Lois: You guys shouldn't have done this!
Stewie: Hey, any time you can celebrate the end of someone's periods.
Nice throw, Casey Anthony.
Stewie: Ah, look at this, she's taped photographs of Virginia Woolf and Katy Perry on the inside cover, as if she's some sort of hip hybrid of those two things.
Brian: Yeah, like she could ever write "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?"
Stewie: "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf" was not written by Virginia Woolf.
Brian: Yeah, obviously, but y'know, it's pretty much about her.
Stewie: It really isn't, Brian.
Meg: Oh, he's so cute!
Stewie: Oh my god, we're getting closer to the beginning! You're Lacey Chabert!
I've taken on bigger challenges before. I had to explain to America why Heidi Klum broke up with Seal. [smash cut to Stewie facing the screen against a white background] Face.
What kind of jerk alters time and then falls asleep?
Stewie: Brian, what the hell are you doing in here? What's happening to my time machine?
Brian: I don't know man, I saw Meg leaving a minute ago going "mwuhahahahaha" but I don't know.
Well, now I've seen Woodrow Wilson naked.
Stay away from my brother's butt.
Look, Brian! Meg is one of the sensitive, bearded Robin Williams characters!
Stewie: Lee writes: "Dear Family Guy, was your show based on anything?" That's a great question, Lee. In fact, Family Guy is based on an American television series called The Simpsons.