Kiss my ass, Josh Groban! I'm an internationally-ranked cheerleading coach!

Your hair looks like a briar patch. I keep expecting racist, animated Disney characters to pop up and start singing about living on the bayou.

I realize my cultural ascendance only serves to illuminate your own banality. But, face it, I'm legend. It's happened.

Will I'm not going to do this. Even your breath stinks of mediocrity.

I'm all about finding a freakish depressed kid and showing them what winning's all about.

Hot Cheetos have been proven to raise endorphins and make happy kids, and I can't have that.

And that gay terrorist went on to become the first gay president of the United States, Abraham Lincoln.

You know, for me trophies are like herpes. You can try to get rid of them but they just keep coming. Sue Sylvester has hourly flair ups of burning itchy highly contagious talent.

I want it to look like Elvis' gold record room at Graceland, except I'll be wanting far few morbidly obese women wandering around.

Bryan: Should I lock the door?
Sue: No, I've got a secret room upstairs. Like Letterman.

Bryan: You ever heard of the term anger sex?
Sue: The only kind I know.

I'll have to take to the mic and deliver a diatribe. Probably something about immigrants.

Glee Quotes

Sex. It's just like hugging. Only wetter.

Holly

I'm gonna miss all of you. I love you guys.

Puck