Sue: You're just like every teenage girl in America: obsessed with vanity. Before you know it, you'll be leaving baggies of vomit in your parents' closet.

I haven't had a solid meal since 1987.

I'm sure Figgins will mumble something nervously and then pretend to take a phone call. I happen to be blackmailing him.

I will no longer be carrying around photo ID. Know why? People should know who I am.

How do you two not have a show on Bravo?

Mercedes, your vocal chords have had more fantastic runs than a Kenyan track team.

I'm gonna leave constant reinvention to Madonna.

I make fun of Will's hair because I'm jealous. There. I said it.

Mercedes: That would make you, like, 30.
Sue: 29.

My parents were famous Nazi hunters, so they weren't around a lot.

I just lost my train of thought because you have so much margarine in your hair.

Madonna belongs to me and I will not be copied. It's in my contract.

Glee Quotes

Rachel: This is what I wanted!
Sam: No, what you wanted was a second chance to get it right and Carmen just gave it to you. If you throw all that away you're going to be making the same mistake all over again

Finn: I seem to recall a rumor about a certain cheerleading coach at this school who once took horse estrogen and posed for Penthouse back in the day. So maybe I can just track that down and make a few copies and sell those to raise money for Regionals.
Sue: That's nothing but a rumor. But if that rumor were true, my Penthouse centerfold so groundbreaking that it completely redefined the term 'hirsute,' and gave birth unto these United States a pose so limber they named it the Regal American Not-So-Bald Spread Eagle, I promise you, my friend, you would never find it.