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Tara: Why does this feel like a small victory? I bet everyone thought that I would be the one to off myself. But guess what Oak Avenue? The lady with all the personalities is not the most f***ed up person on the block.
Kate: You are now.

Chinese checkers - I've got Chinese checkers here!

Max

It's an apron relax.

Tara: Yeah, well, if it makes you feel any better, I'm not having much luck bringing any of my alters out.
Max: I thought this guy was the shit. And at home, we can't get them to stay in.

Tara: I don't remember what happened at boarding school, but I do have vivid memories of a few weeks afterwards. It was a month until summer break, and I couldn't wait to get out. I'm such a total summer person. And I remember I wore my bathing suit under my clothes every day. And while everybody was going to class and going on with their lives, I just sat in my dorm window, waiting for summer to come.
Jenny: Did it?
Tara: The next thing I remember is snow. Everywhere. I was at my parents', and six months had gone by in an instant and it was just white.

Tattoos really hurt. Don't let anyone tell you they don't. But I don't regret it because it will always remind me of Kate. And it didn't hurt nearly as much as pushing all 8 pounds, 7 ounces of her through my birth canal.

Max: How'd it go with Ocean?
Tara: Oceanic.
Max: Oceanic? What does that mean?
Tara: Well, it was interesting. She thinks I'm making real progress, but she also wants to terminate our therapy in a month.

Tara: You're looking up flights to Tokyo?
Kate: Yeah. Not that I'll ever be able to afford it on my sweat shop salary. How about this? Bus ride to Omaha, 45 dollars. Get a free fold-up chair.
Tara: Wow, you must be desperate. Something happened?
Kate: Yeah. I just kinda made a bad decision at work, so now I want to crawl out of my fucking skin. I just wish I could get away like you do.
Tara: Nah, it's not as glamorous as I make it look.

Kate: Mom, what the hell!
T: What's a crack-a-lacking! Pimp-a-limpin'? (to Tevin) Aren't you a yummy bird!
Kate: T! Get outta here! Go skankzilla somewhere else.
T: Come on!
Kate: No, no negotiating. Get out of the fucking jacuzzi right now or I'm gonna call dad.
T: Bitch ass, snitch ass!

Tara: Any way you can help me understand Gimme?
Dr. Ocean: I believe that Gimme holds all your raw emotions. It's Gimme's job to keep the truth from coming to light.

Dr. Ocean: It's just one of your alters showing a side we've never seen.
Tara: Great, now my alters have alters.

Dude, I have been digging around in your closet for an hour and I can't freaking get to Narnia.

Displaying quotes 25 - 36 of 37 in total

United States of Tara Quotes

Katie: Nice whale-tale.
T: Quite hating. You wish you had all this.

Max: Is Mom here?
Marshall: Yeah. I mean Mom's here... but I'm not sure Mom's here.