How I Met Your Mother

Ted Mosby Quotes (Page 11)

Ted: There's a fine line between a true story and a bald-faced lie.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ted: You did not convince her you were Neil Armstrong. The moon landing took place seven years before you were born.
Barney: Ted, baby doll. Minor hurdle.
 • Rating: Unrated

Lily: He naked-muggered you?
Barney: I'm not even going to ask where he was keeping the gun.
Ted: You sure it was a gun?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ted: Are you sure it wasn't a monkey standing on another monkey's shoulders wearing a trench coat?
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Ted: I'm talking about a super date.
Barney: That sounds gooey and romantic -
Ted: Yeah -
Barney: Strip Club?
Ted: Strip Club!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Barney: Oh no, I am not going to give it up, she is. Thanks to Ted's book -
Ted: It's Robins, it's Robins.
Barney: I'm going to stay two steps ahead of her - there's a loop hole in here and I'm going to find it.
 • Rating: Unrated

Robin: What I am not keeping Mike on the hook!
Ted: You are Captain Hook.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ted: Being single sucks - turns you into a crazy person.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Ted: Permission to say 'Lawyered?'
Marshall: Granted.
 • Rating: 4.8 / 5.0

Ted: Like I'm totally going to sit my kids down and talk to them about the time Barney nailed seven chicks in a row.
Future Ted: Am I a bad dad?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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