Tracy Jordan Quotes (Page 7)
Season 5, Episode 2: "When It Rains, It Pours"
Tracy: Well, I'm embarrassed to say I've missed the birth of both of my sons... for very legitimate reasons.
Dot Com: Cooking a French bread pizza and forgot.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 5, Episode 1: "The Fabian Strategy"
Tracy: Why don't you come back home to TGS and pick the peas out of my fried rice... and the rice. I just want carrots.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Liz: The next time you hallucinate just tell yourself "this is not real. I am in control of this."
Tracy: Like the World Cup.
• Rating: Unrated
Tracy: Kenneth! I knew you'd come back. Let me smell your head.
• Rating: Unrated
Tracy: ... then I need you to be back by noon to make the bathroom smell like sandalwood before I wreck it.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 4, Episode 22: "I Do Do"
Tracy: Do a sloppy job and they'll leave you alone. That's how I got out of foreplay with Angie ... and my taxes.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 4, Episode 21: "Emanuelle Goes to Dinosaur Land"
Tracy: Well I'm sorry Sean, and child actor whose name I can't remember. You haven't walked in my shoes! All my life I've tried to forget the things I've seen: I slept on an old dog bed stuffed with wigs! I watched a prostitute stab a clown! Our basketball hoop was a ribcage! A guy in dreds electrocuted my fish! a crackhead breast-feeding a rat! A homeless man cooking a Hot Pocket on a third rail of the G train! The G train, Nermal!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Tracy: I remember being born, of course, and I remember learning to ride a bike. But that was last year.
• Rating: Unrated
Tracy: [on his new movie] Garfield 3: Feline Groovy. It's a pun. Because cats' paws have grooves. They're paying me one million teacher salaries.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 4, Episode 20: "The Moms"
Tracy: Who cares? She's awesome and so am I. I want Serena Williams to be my mother!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
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Total Quotes: 184
