Waylon Smithers Quotes (Page 5)
Season 4, Episode 5: "Treehouse of Horror III"
Mr. Burns: What do you think, Smithers?
Smithers: I think women and seamen don't mix.
• Rating: 4.5 / 5.0
Season 3, Episode 19: "Dog of Death"
Smithers: People like dogs, Mr. Burns.
Burns: Nonsense, dogs are idiots. Think about it Smithers, if I came into your room and started sniffing at your crotch and slobbering all over your face, what would you say?
Smithers: Umm...if you did it, sir?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Smithers: Wanna buy some cookies, wanna buy some cookies?
(Santa's Little Helper runs up to Smithers and greets him)
Burns: If that were a real girl scout, I would have been bothered by now!
• Rating: Unrated
Season 3, Episode 17: "Homer at the Bat"
Burns: You, Strawberry, hit a home run.
Strawberry: Okay, skip.
(hits a home run)
Burns: Ha-ha! I told him to do that.
Smithers: Brilliant strategy sir.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 3, Episode 12: "I Married Marge"
Smithers: (Interviewing Homer) Now, let's say there's a problem with the reactor--
Homer: There's a problem with the reactor?! We're all gonna die!
• Rating: Unrated
Mr. Burns: Who was that young hellcat, Smithers?
Smithers: Homer Simpson, sir.
Mr. Burns: Simpson, eh? I'll remember that name.
• Rating: Unrated
Smithers: (About Homer) This man not only failed the aptitude test, he got trapped in a closet on the way out.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 3, Episode 11: "Burns Verkaufen der Kraftwerk"
Smithers: What's wrong sir, did I get some in your eye? The Shampoo specifically said, "No more tears!"
Mr. Burns: Ah, lovely promise but, one beyond the powers of a mere shampoo.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Mr. Burns: I wanted to give you something to remember me by, I know you've always had your eye on this photo of Elvis and me!
Smithers: He was so good to mother, sir!
Mr. Burns: Yes, but I couldn't understand a word that man said! (Impersonating Elvis) Mistah Burrs, duhs a boom hang gasson for hound dawg!
Smithers: (Laughing) Stop it, you're killing me sir!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 3, Episode 8: "Lisa's Pony"
(Homer prepares to take out a loan from Mr. Burns.)
Mr. Burns: Just sign this form and the money will be yours. (Laughs evilly) Sorry, I was just um...erm...thinking of something funny Smithers did today.
Smithers: I didn't do anything funny today.
Mr. Burns: Shut up!
• Rating: Unrated
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Total Quotes: 76
