Awesome, guys. I didn't know you had it in you. It's like somebody slipped something into your juice boxes.

Terri: I'm the new school nurse.
Will: But you don't have any training.
Terri: Please, Will, it's a public school.

We'll get you sobered up... find you some underwear. It's not too late for you.

Rachel: Think we can win Regionals without Rachel?
Emma: Remember the Jamaican bobsled team? Big longshots!

Being a boy band did wonders for my love life... we started doing it once a week.

My father always said you'd become a man when you bought your first house. I'm not sure what he meant though because he burned ours down during a drunken fight with mom.

Will: Hold on a second, Sue.
Sue: I resent being told to hold on to anything.

Will: We can't afford this.
Terri: All we need to do is give up Applebeer's and AC for the first few summers.

Glee Quotes

[to Kurt] You know, these Mounds bars are delicious, but you have to eat them. If you just hold them in your hand hoping that you might get to eat them one day, they're going to melt and you'll look like somebody just pooped in your hand. Don't let waiting for things to maybe work out with Blaine turn you into the guy who looks like somebody just pooped in their hand.

Brittany

Blaine: Where's the bed?
Brittany: I removed it because when I imagined you two having sex I imagined a U-haul mounting a moped.