A lot of people don't know this, but Aly's full name is Alyson.

That's too much whisky for my frame.

Welcome to hell, Miller!

Jess: Sometimes I think I was bred in a lab to help people.
Winston: You know what else they bred in a lab? Pugs.

You know what would be nice? A wedding invitation engraved on a plate. What a magical wedding that would be.

Winston: Would you consider us adorable?
Nick: No, we're adult men. We're cute.

It's too small to be a cat hotel and too big to be pants so it can't be mine.

Actually the dance class has become more of a dance gathering.

As a cop do you think I would get anyone to do anything if I were being kind and supportive?

I adore gas station television me, myself, personally. It is the intersection between information and gas.

Science aside man you're working those jeans.

I had dibs on her since the first grade dude.

New Girl Quotes

A lot of people never graduated high school! Einstein! Bill Gates! Anne Frank! I'm gonna take back that last one.

Schmidt

I'm not convinced I know how to read, I've just memorized a lot of words.

Nick