Science aside man you're working those jeans.

I had dibs on her since the first grade dude.

Me owe you? You ditched me when we were supposed to run away from school together. I built that raft for nothing.

I've been chasing you for miles like a murderer.

Oh yeah this woman just made my not sexual to do list.

The baby is perfectly fine, but lets just say I did not do a good job.

You know I helped the lady give birth in the kitchen?

Nick has a crush on a girl who is completely out of his league.

I may or may not have done an extensive amount of research on wedding dresses.

Nick: I'm trying my hardest to look poor.
Winston: You are poor.

We gonna make a girl cry today!

Who am I supposed to go to for lady advice now?

New Girl Quotes

I'm not convinced I know how to read, I've just memorized a lot of words.


Get rid of it, Jess. Pine has no place in this loft. It's the wood of poor people and outhouses.