Two and a Half Men

Thursdays 8:30 PM on CBS
Two and a half men
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Jake: He wants me to stay here tonight so he and mom can have sex.
Alan: Oh, Jake, I'm sure that's not the reason. Right, Herb?
Herb: No, that's pretty much it.


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Alan Harper Quotes, Jake Harper Quotes, Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 13 Quotes, Two and a Half Men Quotes
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Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 13 Quotes

Alan: I bought him two pies.
Judith: Why would you do that?
Alan: It seemed easier than explaining to him that his mother's fiancé is a sexual moron

Jake: I'm still awake!
Judith: Happy?
Herb: I may never be happy again