I can't get anything lately unless I threaten to kill myself.

Kelly

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The Office Season 7 Episode 11 Quotes

In the end, the greatest snowball isn't a snowball at all...it's fear. Merry Christmas.

Dwight

I have been trying to get on jury duty every year since I was 18 years old. To get to go sit in an air conditioned room, downtown, judging people, while my lunch is paid for...that is the life.

Stanley