(Edie is showing Bree, Orson and Gloria a cheap house.)
Edie: Let's try to be positive people! It's a fabulous location and just walking distance from all sorts of fun shops.
Bree: Right! From here I can see a bail bonds man and an adult book shop!

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Desperate Housewives Season 3 Episode 9 Quotes

(at the dinner table) Dear Lord, I thank you for this bland, indifferently prepared meal and beseat you to ignite some spark of compassion in my cold hearted daughter-in-law, that she might show some shred of mercy to me, her wretched captive.

Gloria

(looking in a mirror) I hate this dress. I look like something Ike Turner would hit.

Gabrielle
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