Two and a Half Men

Thursdays 8:30 PM on CBS
Two and a half men
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Now she won't return my calls, emails or texts. It is like she is ignoring across the whole digital spectrum. It is like she is Amish.

Walden

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Walden Schmidt Quotes, Two and a Half Men Season 10 Episode 1 Quotes, Two and a Half Men Quotes
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Two and a Half Men Season 10 Episode 1 Quotes

Alan: Wow, seems like just yesterday, he was an adorable, chubby-cheeked little boy catching a Frisbee on the beach in Santa Monica.
Berta: Now, he is a fuzz-face, buck private catching the clap from a whore in Tijuana.

Alan: Can I come live with you?
Evelyn: No
Alan: Oh, come one, Mom, I am going to be homeless, once he marries her; I am going to be living on the street.
Evelyn: Try to pick a street in Beverly Hills, so I visit you