Remember when I mauled that Black teenager's face the other day? You think I did that because he had ice cream on his face? No. I did it because I hoped it would help him go on to be the next Seal.

Wilfred

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Wilfred Season 2 Episode 9 Quotes, Wilfred Quotes
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Wilfred Season 2 Episode 9 Quotes

I don't want to cast a darker shadow on an already tragic day, but I think someone may have eaten part of Jeremy's brains.

Wilfred

Did you see The Bachelorette last night? Brutal.

Wilfred