Roses from a man. I think I'm getting it. Is it wrong that I kind of want to sleep with your dad right now?

Max

Oh thank god it's you Han, I saw the wings and thought heaven was full of chunky Chinese cherubs and no jazz.

Earl

Caroline: Your wings are adorable!
Han: Yes, but matching panties are suffocating the boys.

David: So you're not here to return my Dartmouth T-shirt
Caroline: You gave that to me.
David: No I loaned it to you, I feel like I lost it in a custody battle, and now I'm a deadbeat dad.

Look at me gingerbread! If anything happens to him, I will staple your nutsack to that chair!

Max

Oleg: So no one can get you to come?
Sofi: Some people can get me to come, just not you.
Oleg: Hard to get, I like it.

Sofi: Oh Earl, you make me smile. I wish we had black people in Poland when I was growing up.
Earl: Too bad, we would have really enjoyed segregation and Hitler.

Caroline: Candy hearts. Here, hold out your hand, let's get our heart on.
Oleg: I'm way ahead of you.

Han: I've made a special menu for tomorrow's Valentine's Day celebration
Caroline: Han, that's so romantic
Max: Romantic and wrong. This is "When Harry Met Sally" it's :When Harry Met Salmonella"

2 Broke Girls Season 1 Episode 16 Quotes

Caroline: Candy hearts. Here, hold out your hand, let's get our heart on.
Oleg: I'm way ahead of you.

Han: I've made a special menu for tomorrow's Valentine's Day celebration
Caroline: Han, that's so romantic
Max: Romantic and wrong. This is "When Harry Met Sally" it's :When Harry Met Salmonella"