Jenna: Ok, start from the beginning.
Lawyer: Well the plaintiff's deposition alleges that...
Tracy: No, further back. What kind of dinosaur was your grandfather?

Thank you for calling Florida emergency services. If this is about an anaconda in a crawl space, press one.


Jack: I can give you a season pass to Universal's Harry Potter World.
Liz: Ok, I am not some kind of nerdery slut. I like Star Wars!

I love my mother, Lemon, obviously because of Stockholm Syndrome.


My grandfather's purple's terrible what alcoholism can do to the body.


Liz: Did you get my gift?
Jack: I assumed it was the bottle of wine with the card reading "Dear Doritos, what about just selling bags full of your dust? I could put it on chicken or fish..."

Wonderful news? The last time I said that was when my pet News learned the true meaning of Christmas. Classic Tracy. You'll miss this.


Banks: How'd you get these DNA results back so fast?
Jack: I happen to have some very powerful friends at The Maury Povich Show.

Damn it! Why do I keep helping you? I'll just do anything for approval. I would have been a Nazi.


For every orphan Annie, there's a 30-year-old Russian dwarf who's just pretending to be a child, according to a movie that I watched part of.


Jack: How much time and energy have we wasted with our sparring and our gravel-voiced double entendre?
Banks: An ass-load.

Jack: You also know Jack Donaghy always wins, or have you forgotten the time we played Battleship? Remember A-8?
Devon Banks: You peeked!

30 Rock Quotes

Jenna: Oh, I'm not worried because I have something the other actors don't.
Liz: Don't say your sexuality.
Jenna: My sexuality.
Liz: Oh, god, Jenna! When has that ever worked?
Jenna: When has it not worked?!

Passing out and cursing on St. Patrick's Day. Is nothing sacred anymore?