Season 1, Episode 16: "The Source Awards"
Ridikolus: What color plane are you want to buy?Jack: Clear... like Wonder Woman's.
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Tracy: I'm just going through the classic stages of grief; fear, denial, horniness, wisdom, sleepiness and now depression.
Kenneth: What about anger?
Tracy: No! I don't wanna do anger and you can't make me!
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Liz: You can't solve all your problems by shooting someone or setting a stranger on fire.
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Jack: Don't be ridiculous.
Ridikolus: I am Ridikolus.
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Ridikolus: Aww man you didn't just skuff these shoes. P Diddy wears these shoes.
Kenneth: Oh, will he be mad when you give them back?
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Jack: The Game?
Tracy: Nope.
Jack: T.I.?
Tracy: It not happenin.
Jack: Super head?
Tracy: No can do.
Jack: Fabolous?
Tracy: Wont do.
Jack: Redonkeykong?
Tracy: Nope.
Jack: MC Skat Kat?
Tracy: What?
Jack: HoMONKulus?
Tracy: Uh-uh.
Jack: Raw Dog?
Tracy: Hell no! Me an his beef go way back. We were both on cast members on Nickelodeon show called "Ray-Ray's Garage."
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Tracy: Who else is going to be at that party?
Jack: Well, you're going to be sharing the stage with NAS...
Tracy: Nope, he hates me! We used to date the same girl.
Jack: What about Young Jeezy?
Tracy: Forget about it. I called his pit bull gay on 106th and Park.
Liz: That would do it.
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Liz: I truly don't like you as a person. [inspirational music plays] Can't one human being not like another human being? Can't we all just not get along?
Steven: Liz, I wish it could be like that... and maybe someday our children or our children's children will hate each other like that, but it just doesn't work that way today.
Liz: So what you're saying is that any woman that doesn't like you is a racist.
Steven: No, no, no, no, no. Some women are gay.
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Tracy: If you get rich off this stuff, just take care of my family. I don't want my kids to have to go to college.
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Season 1, Episode 15: "Hard Ball"
Jack: He is not your friend, he's your opponent. He's going to try to grab all the marbles and it's our job to hide them.Liz: That's not how you play marbles, Jack.
Jack: But that's how you keep them.
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Total Quotes: 545
