To her I'm just a gorgeous, naturally blonde ATM.

Jenna

Wow, an old white lady yelling at me while wearing microwaveable socks. This is so different than living with my mom.

Frank

I saw it because it's on a compilation DVD I have of fat ladies crying.

Frank

I guess I'll get one of those throat radios and you'll be buried in a piano crate. Good night, Liz.

Frank

Oh, I'd like to pre-apologize for clogging your tub, sink, and toilet.

Frank

Hi, I was told I'd get paid if I came here and danced while the Atlanta Hawks ate dinner.

Jenna

[to Jack] Wear something nice. Like a pair of white jeans and a Dan Marino jersey.

Verna

Nice office, Jack. I feel like I'm in the Martha Stewart section of K-Mart.

Verna

Yeah, this show will have laughter. Tears. Topless arguments. Infections caused by jacuzzi water!

Verna

Jack: She's done a complete 180.
Jenna: Even better, Jack. She made a full 360!

It's stuff like this that makes me eat stuff like this.

Liz

Were any of the firemen strong? Were any of them the ones from the calendar?

Lutz