Listen to me. I sound like Cagney and Lacey but without the slutty clothes.

Liz

Dot Com: You think we don't want him back? Do you know how much our cobra payments are? And he's the only one who knows the combination to the candy safe.
Grizz: The worst part is being able to see the candy.

I was trapped in a world of wet wipes and rectal thermometers. Then the babies came and life changed.

Devon

Kenneth: How was substitute teaching sir?
Pete: Just like Lean On Me, in that a guy who looks like Morgan Freeman swung a bat at me.

This isn't even baby vomit on my jacket. It's mine. All mine.

Devon

Jack, we've been waiting almost an hour for this Banks fella. The only explanation I can think of is that he keeps stopping to perform good deeds.

Hank

These aren't babies, they're organ farms.

Devon

Aaron Sorkin: We make horse buggies; the first Model T just rolled into town.
Liz: We're dinosaurs.
Aaron Sorkin: We don't need two metaphors. That's bad writing, not that it matters.

Aaron Sorkin: I'm Aaron Sorkin. The West Wing, A Few Good Men, The Social Network...
Liz: Studio 60.
Aaron Sorkin: Shut up.

I tracked him down to an address in Brooklyn. He's on LinkedIn, Lemon. He might as well be dead.

Jack

He's a gay shark, like the actor who played Jaws.

Jack

There is a gay Jack Donaghy. His name is Devon Banks.

Jack
Displaying quotes 61 - 72 of 300 in total

30 Rock Season 5 Quotes

I tracked him down to an address in Brooklyn. He's on LinkedIn, Lemon. He might as well be dead.

Jack

Ambition is the willingness to kill the things you love and eat them in order to stay alive. Haven't you ever read my throw pillow?

Jack
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