Accidentally on Purpose Quotes
Dude, you do have a toy you can play with. Just take more trips downtown on the alone train. Have an all-by-yourself party! Be a one-man band
Davis [to Zack]
Davis [to Billie's breasts]: And good morning to you. And good morning to you.
Billie: I see you've noticed my recent pregnancy gift from the boob fairy.
Davis: That's such a better job than being the tooth fairy
Zack: [Billie's] douche ex-boyfriend got me thinking that I am way over my head.
Dr. Roland: Well, douche ex-boyfriends are known for their wisdom
Davis: Actually, I enjoy the word jumble. I think I'd be really good at writing those.
James: Are you finished?
Davis: You mean, am I ifnished?
Maybe I should just put a bag over your head, drive you to the middle of the woods, and we can talk there
Olivia [to Davis]
Ryan: You're gonna close your eyes. We're gonna spin you around. Now, whoever you take a picture of, you gotta try and nail.
Zack: Wait, wait, wha-- what if it's a dude?
Davis: Just look interested in what he's saying. Guys looove that
Billie: I tossed [Zack's] room.
Abby: You did not!
Billie: Oh, but I did. I tossed it like a prison guard looking for crack
Billie: Are people staring at me because I just broke up with the boss and accidentally got impregnated by a 22-year-old on a futon? Or, and this is the one I want you to say, because my hair turned out all bouncy and fun?
Olivia: Actually, people are staring 'cause you've got a great big hunk of cream cheese on your boob
Zack: Can you believe that guy?
Davis: Yeah, he's like a really handsome Darth Vader
I have to think of my future. I want a husband one day. One with a checking account and... a toothbrush he acquired via purchase rather than "dibs."
Billie
Zack: You said you were thirty-two.
Billie: That was when I thought I was never going to see you again
Abby: Didn't you use condoms?
Billie: I guess it turns out they're not 100% effective unless you actually take them out of your purse.
Olivia: Billie, Billie, Billie, always use a condom... and an alias
