Mondays 10:00 PM on FX

Woodhouse: 1,200 pounds
Archer: No one is getting killed over however much that is in real money.

Did you see that? That was like like Steve McQueen and John Woo had a baby and that baby was you, baby.


Archer: You want me to take a baby to a murder?
Malory: Wherever, just out of here. I have no more love to give today.
Archer: What is it, like 2:30?

Pam: Can you explain compounding interest to Cheryl?
Cyril: Maybe if we had an infinite amount of time and she was some one else

I can do baby or I can do geezer murder mystery but I can't do both!


Archer: Cannot picture you as a fighter pilot.
Woodhouse: Oh no, sir. Not a pilot - a batman. An officer's personal attendant, in charge of keeping his kit in good order, seeing to his personal needs.
Archer: So a servant.
Woodhouse: Solider servant was the official term.
Archer: Yeah, way to advance.

Woodhouse: One by one, the last surviving member of the double duece are being... murdered.
Archer: Oh my god.... are we out of Bloody Marys?

Archer: You realize you're in huge trouble.
Woodhouse: Yes, sir.
Archer: And now I have to spend my first Friday off in like forever...
Woodhouse: Yes, sir.
Archer: ...devising some bizarre punishment for you.
Woodhouse: Yes, sir.
Archer: So don't be suprised if you find yourself eating a whole bunch of spiderwebs.

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