Archer

Mondays 10:00 PM on FX
Archer
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They called you exotic. Which is just people talk for awesome. Which you are.

That's racist. Jingoist. Whatever.

Ouch my eyes. It's like being shot in the eyes by a glitter gun.

Archer: I got to blow up a train.
Lana: Thanks, Gomez.
Archer: Nice.

Lana: Please tell me that's a smoke grenade.
Archer: Okay. it's not though.

Malory: Have the porter bring me a cobb salad.
Lana: Before or after we capture the dangerous terrorist?
Malory: Before.

My great-grandfather was nuts for skating. That and the Klan.

Cheryl

Armed with what? Pamphlets about Canada's responsible gun control laws?

Thanks, Freddy Foreshadowing.

Can I just put what I assume is your rock collection on the stupid train?

Pam

Speaking of excellence, did you hear we met a tiger? Then he got murdered.

Calzado: Crocodiles on a three wheeler?
Archer: Right, how scary would that be?

Displaying quotes 37 - 48 of 79 in total

Archer Season 3 Quotes

Bloody mary, blessed are you among cocktails. Pray for me now in the hour of my death, which I hope is soon. Amen.

Archer

Sterling: A ruse? Hi, it's 1930s, can have our words, and clothes, and shitty plane back?
Rip: Let's go, kid.
Sterling: Call you back, 1930s. And, hey, watch out for that Adolf Hitler. He's a bad egg.