Tobias: You didn't tell me you had a drug problem.
DeBrie: We met at a methadone clinic.
Tobias: Are you high? We met at an acting class.

Tobias: Here's to our acting addiction!
DeBrie: Yep.
Tobias: May we never be cured!
DeBrie: You should never give up a dream if you can write scripts!

I'm sorry, Mother. It's just, I've got a bit of a stick up my bunghole about what I've now found is a running joke about me. But let's be honest. For 2,000 rupees we'd both go down on Matthew McConaughey.

Tobias

Tobias: Well, you look like I feel.
Gob: Gay?

Tobias: Everyone thinks I'm gay?
Lindsay: I mean, it's kind of a running joke...in the family.

Is there a little girl here all by herself?

Tobias
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