Gob: I need a favor.
Michael: What happened to "Hello. I need a favor"?

Michael: Well, those lessons worked, didn't they? I mean, we still leave notes to this day.
Lindsay: Oh, that's what that was about. I thought he was trying to get us off of dairy.

George, Sr.: Why?! If someone had left a note, this innocent man would still have his arm! Why?!
J. Walter Weatherman: And that's why you always leave a note.

Lindsay: Well, I think stress is what leads to trouble. You know the kind you put on George Michael, even when he gets an A?
Michael: Minus. And an A gets him ice cream. He knows that.

Michael: All I'm saying, Lindsay, is that, you know, you might want to push her a little bit because a kid without discipline can get into some pretty tough stuff.
Lindsay: So, you think she's going to suddenly turn to drugs because she got a C plus?
Michael: Minus. And yes, I think that without boundaries, a kid can get into trouble, and yeah, sometimes that can mean drugs.

Michael: A minus, huh?
George Michael: Proud of me?
Michael: Very proud. Minus. Better go hit the books. Get up there.

Michael: You knew the whole time, didn't you?
George Michael: Well, sort of. One of the Hot Cops is my choir teacher.

Maeby: "C minus." C m-i-n-e-s.
Lindsay: Did you even study?
Maeby: No, I didn't.
Lindsay: Wow. How impressive is that?

Michael: Your uncle Gob seems to think that he saw you down at the docks today. Was that you?
George Michael: No. Maybe it was the other George Michael. You know, the singer-songwriter.

I don't criticize you! And if you're worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense.

Lucille

Maeby: (working with Lucille) This is so much fun. I can't believe my mom thought being here would be a punishment.
Lucille: Oh, she thinks I'm too critical. That's another fault of hers.

Michael: You mean you taught me a lesson not to teach lessons?
George Sr.: It was my last lesson.

Arrested Development Season 1 Episode 10 Quotes

Drug Dealer: You set us up!
Gob: No! These are just strippers! Look how hot they are!

George Michael: Well, I think we're okay.
Michael: We are. I mean, you know that there's nothing that you can't be totally honest with me about. I mean, you could say anything to me, you know? Anything at all.
George Michael: Like, say I had a crush on my own cousin.
Michael: Hey! You just taught me a lesson. All right, we're even.