Arrested Development

Arrested Development "Ready, Aim, Marry Me" Quotes

Tobias: (while looking at a gift intended for Sally) That is quite a basket you've got there, Michael.
 • Rating: Unrated

Tobias: Do you have any idea how often you say the word 'afraid'?
Michael: Well, I know I used it in the jacuzzi.
Tobias: And I apologize for that; I thought it was a pool toy.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Tobias: Wait, wait, wait. Lindsay's here? With two men?
Buster: Hmmm, sort of one and a half.
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: You were not on a date with Dragon.
Lindsay: I know that, Michael. It was pretty obvious when Dragon kept swooping Uncle Jack in for a kiss.
 • Rating: Unrated

Lucille: She's trying to prove that she's closer to my children than I am, but the jokes on her because she doesn't know how little I care for Gob.
Michael: I think that makes the joke on Gob.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Michael: So what do you say? We got a basket full of father-son fun here.
George Michael: What's kama sutra oil?
Michael: Maybe it's not for us.
 • Rating: Unrated

Tobias: I'm afraid I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run, if you will. So now I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands.
Michael: There's just so many poorly chosen words in that sentence.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Michael: (about the basket) Why don't you take this? I don't have anyone to go with anyway.
Tobias: Can you imagine how jealous that would make her? "Where's Tobias?!" "Oh, he's just sharing a romantic horseback ride with Michael Bluth and they're dipping each other in..." Oh, you didn't get anybody chocolate ...
Michael: I didn't mean with me. I hate to see you struggle like this. In fact, why don't you let me ask her for you?
Tobias: Well, Michael, you really are quite the cupid, aren't you? I tell you, you can zing your arrow into my buttocks anytime.
Michael: Okay. You know what you do? Buy yourself a tape recorder. Record yourself for a whole day. I think you're gonna be surprised at some of your phrasing.
Tobias: (gasps) Butterscotch! Want a lick?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Michael: It all makes sense. Why else would Sally Sitwell be avoiding me?
Lindsay: Because she thinks you're a loser.
Gob: And why would Lucille 2 be so distant toward me?
Lindsay: Because she knows you're a loser.
 • Rating: Unrated

Lucille: Buster, nice of you to take a break from that common whore you've been dating.
Buster: She is not a whore, mother, she happens to be the new secretary of the Bluth company. And yes, she may be more experienced than a normal girl, but sometimes love should be terrifying.
 • Rating: Unrated

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