(hearing word of a boxing match) What about me? I wanna fight!

Ray

I'm having a baby and the mother of my child hates me.

Ray

I can't believe I shot thirty blanks - I'm a sterile loser.

Ray

Your sperm is my sperm.

Suzanne

(realizing that they got caught breaking and entering by some Rabbi's) Hey - it's okay! I'm Jewish!

Jonathan

The only thing that I found in the kitchen is an unopened bottle of kombucha tea..why would they leave this? This stuff is great and so expensive!

Jonathan

She liked me! And my pot.

Jonathan

When I get high I realize that I clench my anus.

Ray

I like a man who carries a one-hitter.

Girl at the store
Displaying all 9 quotes

Bored to Death Season 1 Episode 7 Quotes

When I get high I realize that I clench my anus.

Ray

I like a man who carries a one-hitter.

Girl at the store
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