Brooklyn Nine-Nine
Thursdays 8:00 PM on NBCFavorite Brooklyn Nine-Nine Quotes
I don't wanna be a jerk, I know you're dating Teddy and it's going really well.
Jake
This whole place reeks of bacon. Well guess what? I'm going kosher. Cause Jakey don't dig on swine!
Jake
The last lady I went out with burst into tears when I told her I was a Gemini.
Jake
I agree - with the stuff about the drill, not the spineless ass-kissing.
Rosa
No waiting, just toasting. I want you to toast, now I wanna eat toast, gimme some toast!
Terry
How did you manage to step on both of my feet at the same time
Jake
Amy: What was your worst date ever?
Jake: I think it's like a 50-way tie.
Vivian is my fiancee. My ex-fiancee. My never-wife.
Charles
Permission to go to the bathroom?
Amy
Jake. Granted. First of three. Use them wisely.
I’m sorry – I just get so emotional when I talk about how bogus Thanksgiving is
Jake
Santiago: Pretty hungover? Peralta: Shhhhh...turn off your mouth siren...
Terry: Sorry about your hand.
Charles: Thanks. It makes it really hard to manipulate my egg sack.