Tuesdays 9:30 PM on FOX

Checking out my new bed. Great - feels like scoliosis and smells like 10 million butts.


Holt: Santiago...
Amy: Oh no...Santiago in B-flat...you're disappointed.

Jake, he is a sea-witch in disguise, do not sing into his shell!


Charles: We can fill his locker with shaving cream and loose hair.
Rosa: I like it. I cannot believe that I'm considering a non-violent option

It's awful...it sounds like Joy Behar falling down some stairs!


Gina: Jake, you have 6 massage chairs.
Jake: Well they don't make a massage couch!

Jake: So talk to me Goose, how are we lookin'?
Gina: Sexy, but not like we're trying to, but like, sure we're trying, but it's almost effortless?

Next time I catch him shaving I'm gonna punch him so hard in the mouth that he bites his own heart.


I feel like a proud mama hen whose baby chicks have learned to fly!

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