Californication

Sundays 10:30 PM on Showtime
Californication
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The only thing I'm guilty of is poor judgement.

Hank

Get me a strainer, I'll clean it up, I'll make it nice.

Hank

Revenge is a dish best served with my dick.

Hank

I look like a fucking FBI agent.

Hank

I don't know how we got here, but this is where we are.

Karen

I'll always be buzzing around like a gnat, like a well-hung gnat, with a dream.

Hank

Once you were my future, then you were my misery, now you're almost my past.

Karen

Becca: Dad do we look like the kind of girls who are into American Idol?
Hank: No not so much, actually you like girls who would hurt girls who were into American Idol.

Marcy: I don't know what to tell you Charlie? The heart wants.
Charlie: Well this heart wants freedom from responsibility and an abundance of strange.

There is nothing wrong with the big blue bus.

Karen

Get a load of black Jesus, he turn water in whiskey too?

Hank

Your virginity is mine brother Runkle!

Peggy
Displaying quotes 25 - 36 of 116 in total

Californication Season 4 Quotes

Remember how fast my masturbation video spread? That was unnerving.

Charlie

Hank: What's that look?
Charlie: What look?
Hank: That shifty somewhat cunty look of yours.