Community

Community "Home Economics" Quotes

Abed [to Britta about Jeff]: Draw the tape worm out of him with the bowl of milk that is your sexuality
 • Rating: Unrated

Abed: Sometimes I like to pour hot chocolate mix into cold milk and drink it with hot cocoa, I call it special drink
Jeff: And some day you will know it by its true name, diabetes
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jeff: Every piece of that condo is a piece of my life
Britta: Is that a bidet?
Jeff: That part is for resale value and Saturday afternoons
 • Rating: Unrated

Jeff: The next person that offers me pity will be mentioned by name in my suicide note
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Abed: Jeff, did I say anything in my sleep last night about farm animals or Brian Williams?
Jeff: ...I don't think so.
Abed: Cool. Cool, cool, cool. [edit]
 • Rating: Unrated

Britta: Maybe you're one of those rare people with nothing underneath the surface. Maybe, if you put stain remover on a turd, you don't get a diamond. You just get a turd, with less direction in life
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jeff: TV's the best dad there is. TV never came home drunk. TV never forgot me at the zoo. TV never abused and insulted me... unless you count Cop Rock
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Shirley [to Annie]: Love is a gamble always, but waiting won't change the dice. Either you roll them or you lose your turn
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Britta [to Jeff]: Downgrading your lifestyle is your chance to grow as a person, maybe even become one.
 • Rating: Unrated

Pierce: Before AIDS, sex was like shaking hands.
Abed: Hence AIDS
 • Rating: 4.9 / 5.0

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