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Community

I thought pushing that woman's head through a jukebox would make me feel better, but I'm just out $54...and a marriage.

Shirley

I know you're all wondering how I do it. How do I balance straight A's, extracurriculars, and Israeli folk dancing every Friday night?

Annie

Abed, we don't have origin stories, we have lives. At least...yup, just me.

Jeff

Britta, we're done. I ate a hamburger the other day and suddenly I'm not cold all the time.

Protester

We're really filling in some plot holes here.

Abed

I call it "the Crazy Quilt of Destiny," mostly because "the Loom of Fate" was already taken.

Abed

Abed: I'm the super-villain. I'm emotionless, logical, smarter than everyone else--
Annie: Hey!

Abed: If you like "Star Wars," why do you want to murder it and urinate on its grave? The prequels are terrible. I mean, seriously, wouldn't Chewbacca at some point go, "Hey, Yoda! I know that guy!"
Kid #1: He has double light sabers.
Abed: That's stupid. You're both stupid.

I'm out. I chang-ed my mind.

Chang
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