Community

Community Quotes (Page 2)

Season 4 Episode 11: "Basic Human Anatomy"

Dean Pelton: Which is to say that having Jeffrey inside of me-
Jeff: No one was inside of anyone!
Dean Pelton: -was wrong. To have Jeffrey inside of me.
 • Rating: Unrated

Shirley: Is this a bad time?
Dean Pelton (speaking as Jeff): I'm at Greendale, stuck in the body of a man who could be Gollum, so yeah, I'd say it's half past suck.
 • Rating: Unrated

Maintenance Guy: Sorry, routine light switch check.
Jeff: That is not a thing!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Pierce: What do you want me to do?
Jeff: Stay alive...or don't!
Pierce: I'm on it!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jeff: Holy makes-complete-sense-at-this-school!
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 4 Episode 10: "Intro to Knots"

Britta: So you just left your section blank.
Jeff: No, of course not! I copied and pasted the lyrics to "War (What Is It Good For)."
 • Rating: Unrated

Jeff: It's Macallan 18. I like to serve it neat, if that's okay with you.
Professor Cornwallis: What, in America? Don't you mix it with cherry pop or Monterey Jack cheese?
 • Rating: Unrated

Jeff: You ruined Christmas dinner so that you could be crowned the smartest person at the dumbest school?
 • Rating: Unrated

Abed: John McClane's tank top! You're getting really good at Christmas, Troy.
 • Rating: Unrated

Abed: This is amazing, and possibly in real time!
 • Rating: Unrated

Professor Cornwallis: Seeing as you saved me from my annual Christmas tradition of plum pudding, roasted goose, and updating my suicide note, I suppose that I could give you a C...plus.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 4 Episode 9: "Intro to Felt Surrogacy"

Troy: We're stranded here forever...and I've never seen Blue Man Group!...I did see Blue Man Group! I just didn't get it! Why can't they talk? They have so much in common!
 • Rating: Unrated

Jeff: So this is how Greendale graduates end up--as transient mountain men. Not as bad as I thought.
 • Rating: Unrated

Shirley: What happened is between us and Jesus. And Jesus don't snitch.
 • Rating: Unrated

Shirley: See? Prayer works.
Britta: So does gravity, Shirley.
Shirley: And you know who invented gravity, right?
 • Rating: Unrated

Britta: It's puppet therapy. The psychology world has recently embraced it after seeing it on "Law & Order."
 • Rating: Unrated

Britta: Are we just gonna avoid eye contact forever? What are we, Jeff during sex?
 • Rating: Unrated

Britta: Who's holding? I have four berries, but I'm saving them for "Laser Floyd."
 • Rating: Unrated

Dean: This awkward silence has been going on for days! Granted, Jeffrey looks amazing when he broods, but this has got to stop!
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 4 Episode 8: "Herstory of Dance"

Chang: I'll be spinning hits from yesterday and today, which are basically the same to me, since I have changnesia.
 • Rating: Unrated

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