Cougar Town Season 1 Episode 16: "What Are You Doin' In My Life?" Quotes
Travis: I'm sure it's not that bad, let me see.
Barb: No! Innocence should be lost in the bedroom... or on a commercial cruise liner.
Grayson [referring to Bobby's toaster]: Does this work?
Bobby: It works as a container for envelopes and if you put it on a plate, it makes a good prop toaster
Jules: We all have our embarrassing family members.
Bobby [walks in]: Hello! That wasn't a coincidence, I was out back waiting for an entrance line.
Ellie: How are you not embarrassed?
Bobby: Sorry Ellie, can't be done.
Andy: It's true, this is the guy who's main goal in life is to party so hard he craps his pants in every country.
Bobby: I already knocked off America and Mexico. Mexico was easy.
Jules: Oh my god Laurie, your butt looks amazing in those jeans.
Sheila: Goodbye Ellen.
Jules: I'm gonna be Portia.
You need to get your crazy ass out of my office right now or I'm gonna call plaza security and they're gonna roller blade in.. in like 40 minutes.Jules
Sheila: Why do you have a post-it that says "I'm awesome?"
Jules: Because I am.
Ellie: We are not friends, human beings cannot be friends with chimps
Bobby: Sure they can. My buddy Daryl was best friends with his chimp, Binky.
Jules: It's true. Until Binky turned six and then he get angry one day and ripped of Daryl's arm.
Bobby: They're still friends, they're just not best friends.
Bobby: What up reading glasses? What'd you get those for your 1000th birthday?
Ellie: You are the only one that finds my deteriorating eyesight amusing.